Still, the irony bites because loneliness often comes with emotional dysregulation: worry spirals, memories sharpen, and the mind starts narrating worst-case stories. In that state, reaching for others can become less about connection and more about relief—like grabbing for a life raft without checking whether it floats.
Psychological research helps explain the pattern. John Bowlby’s attachment theory (notably in *Attachment and Loss*, 1969–1980) describes how distress activates “protest” behaviors—urgent bids for closeness that can feel frantic or misdirected. Coupland’s line captures that grim timing: the ache that drives us outward may also make our outreach less clear, less patient, and less grounded. [...]
