Rewriting Expectations To Liberate Your Whole Life
Rewrite what others expect of you; the new draft can free an entire life — Simone de Beauvoir
The Call to Rewrite the Script
Simone de Beauvoir’s line—“Rewrite what others expect of you; the new draft can free an entire life”—invites us to treat our existence like a text we are allowed to edit. Rather than accepting inherited roles as final, she suggests we pick up the pen and question every assumption about who we should be. This shift from passive acceptance to active authorship is the first movement from constraint toward freedom, framing life as an ongoing work in progress rather than a finished script handed down by others.
Existential Freedom and Social Roles
This idea grows directly from Beauvoir’s existentialism, developed alongside Jean-Paul Sartre in mid‑20th‑century Paris. In *The Ethics of Ambiguity* (1947), she argues we are “condemned to be free”: even when we obey, we are choosing to obey. Yet, social roles—worker, spouse, child, citizen—often disguise themselves as destiny. By recognizing them as contingent constructions rather than absolute truths, we begin loosening their hold, preparing the ground for a new “draft” of our lives.
Gendered Expectations as Chains
Nowhere is this clearer than in gender. In *The Second Sex* (1949), Beauvoir famously writes, “One is not born, but rather becomes, a woman,” highlighting how society scripts femininity as passivity and sacrifice. Similarly, masculinity is often drafted as stoicism and dominance. When she urges us to rewrite expectations, she is challenging these gendered scripts in particular. Questioning why a daughter “must” care for everyone or why a son “must not” cry becomes a concrete act of liberation.
The Craft of Redrafting Your Life
Translating this philosophy into practice involves deliberate, sometimes uncomfortable revision. First, we have to identify which expectations govern our choices: whose approval we chase, which careers feel ‘acceptable,’ what kind of love seems ‘respectable.’ Then we start editing—perhaps by declining a family tradition that erases our identity, or by choosing a vocation that values meaning over prestige. Each small revision to the expected storyline strengthens our ability to author a life aligned with our values rather than others’ demands.
From Individual Edits to Collective Freedom
Finally, Beauvoir’s insight extends beyond personal fulfillment to social transformation. When individuals rewrite expectations, they also weaken the old scripts for everyone else. Feminist movements, civil rights struggles, and queer activism all illustrate this: each person who refused a prescribed role made new possibilities legible to others. Thus, the “new draft” of one life can ripple outward, altering what seems imaginable for an entire community, and demonstrating how personal courage in rewriting expectations can help free many lives, not just one.