Choosing Courage First, Letting Propriety Catch Up

Make a brave choice today; propriety will follow courage. — Jane Austen
Courage Before Convention
Austen’s line urges a reversal of the usual order: instead of asking what is proper and then acting, she suggests acting bravely and trusting that propriety will align in time. In other words, moral backbone, not social approval, should lead. This reflects a deeper claim that true integrity is often ahead of its era, while rules and customs tend to lag behind human conscience.
Austen’s World of Rules and Risks
Placed against the backdrop of Regency England, the statement becomes even sharper. Austen wrote in a society bound by etiquette—on class, gender, and marriage. Within that tight framework, her heroines repeatedly risk disapproval to do what is right. Consequently, the quote reads less like a gentle maxim and more like a quiet rebellion against letting rigid social codes dictate one’s character.
Heroines Who Step Out of Line
Throughout Austen’s novels, characters embody this principle. Elizabeth Bennet in *Pride and Prejudice* refuses Mr. Collins’s proposal despite immense pressure, choosing self-respect over financial security. Likewise, Elinor and Marianne in *Sense and Sensibility* navigate love by listening first to conscience. Initially, their choices seem improper to others, yet by the end, their courage appears not only justified but exemplary, and social opinion adjusts around them.
From Social Approval to Moral Propriety
The quote also distinguishes between two types of propriety: mere conformity and genuine moral rightness. Austen hints that when courage is guided by a well-formed conscience—rather than by impulse—what looks shocking at first may later be recognized as the truly proper course. Thus, propriety is not abandoned; it is refined and elevated by brave action, revealing which customs deserve to survive.
Living the Principle Today
Applied to modern life, Austen’s insight encourages principled risk-taking: reporting misconduct at work, ending an unhealthy relationship, or defending an unpopular truth. Such choices may appear improper within a given group’s norms. Yet, as with Austen’s characters, time often vindicates those who lead with courage. By acting bravely first—and thoughtfully—individuals help reshape what their communities eventually come to regard as proper and just.