Clarissa Pinkola Estés

The Cost of Belonging and Selfhood

Yet Estés pivots to the second, quieter tragedy: compliance can estrange us from ourselves. When we consistently reshape our desires to match others’ wishes, we may remain physically included while becoming internally absent. Over time, this can feel like living as a carefully edited version of oneself—socially acceptable, emotionally dislocated. Psychologically, this resembles what D.W. Winnicott called the “false self” in his writings on adaptation and authenticity (e.g., Winnicott, 1960), where a person presents a compliant persona that protects them from rejection but distances them from spontaneous feeling. The exile Estés describes is therefore not dramatic but cumulative: each small self-silencing adds up until the person no longer knows what they actually want. [...]

Embracing Risk as the Pathway to Personal Growth

Moving from grand exploration to internal journeys, many psychologists contend that personal growth emerges from embracing uncertainty. Carl Jung, for instance, viewed individuation—the process of becoming one’s true self—as requiring a confrontation with the unfamiliar aspects of our psyche. Facing this uncharted territory may be daunting, but as Estés suggests, it is the only route to authentic thriving. [...]

Thriving Through the Courage to Cross Horizons

Building from this idea, stepping beyond the horizon symbolizes embracing risk as a prerequisite for thriving. Growth—whether intellectual, emotional, or spiritual—demands venturing into uncertainty. In Estés’s seminal work, 'Women Who Run with the Wolves' (1992), she draws upon Jungian psychology and global folklore to illustrate that only by facing the unknown can the soul renew itself and flourish. [...]

Do Not Be Daunted by the Enormity of the World’s Grief. Act. — Clarissa Pinkola Estés

The quote encourages individuals to recognize their agency, no matter the scale of the problems. As in Anne Frank’s diary (*The Diary of a Young Girl*, 1947), even confined in hiding and faced with horror, Anne held onto a belief that her words and hope mattered in the face of crushing adversity. [...]

Stepping into the Unknown to Rediscover the Known Within – Clarissa Pinkola Estés

Facing new and unexplored situations transforms our understanding of ourselves and the world. [...]

The Fire Within You Is Your Roadmap; Follow It - Clarissa Pinkola Estés

By following their inner fire, people are more likely to experience personal growth, fulfillment, and alignment with their true purpose rather than conforming to societal expectations. [...]

Act as If You Are Happy to Be Alive; You Will Be - Clarissa Pinkola Estés

This quote highlights the importance of mindset and the ability to shape your emotions and experiences through deliberate action. By choosing to act happy, you may actually start to feel that happiness. [...]